nine

The following morning sky was dull and grey. The sparkling spring of the previous day confined to memory. The grim weather rather suited my mood. I was a long way down path I never intended to travel and I had a feeling I’d never make it back to the higher ground. Emma reinforced my feeling of helplessness by trotting naked down the stairs as was about to leave. I watched her small breasts bouncing, her brown nipples hypnotised me, leaving helpless to do anything but nod in a final acceptance of my fate as she ordered me to get it sorted with Kathy.

I drove towards the office thinking about the previous evening. Emma and I had discussed Greta and Bob’s wedding at some length, and finally I had come to terms with my fears and faced the fact that we were going to organise this event, and we all were going to maintain of proud tradition of dressing the part, or not in this case. There was however one hurdle that Emma insisted I got over, and that was her bete noir, Kathy. If we were to do our jobs properly we had to be comfortable naked. In a complete about face Emma, who a fortnight ago had threatened me with castration, was now encouraging me to spend time naked with Kathy. I shuddered, not at the thought of seeing my business partner in the nude, which I have to admit is something that I always fancied, but at the thought of us, naked together was more than disconcerting.

I parked the car as near as I could to the office, which was about a quarter of a mile away. As I hurried along ranting to myself about draconian parking restrictions a passing bus sloshed though a large brown puddle left by the night’s spring rain. The driver was a true professional and had judged his swerve to perfection and the last thing I saw before a wall of muddy water engulfed me was the triumphant grin on his face. It was of little comfort to me that I had probably brightened up his dull mundane existence.

Our secretary Carol wasn’t in so only Kathy was on hand to share the malevolent bus driver’s little joke.

“It’s not fun” I protested “Even my pants are soaked!”

When she had stopped laughing she strode over to the door the street locked it, and then proceeded to pull down the window blinds as I stood dripping forlornly onto the office carpet.

Kathy pointed to my office.

“Get in there and get your clothes off” she commanded “I’ll take them next-door to Deirdre’s to be cleaned. You’ll have them back in an hour”

“What” I protested “I can’t sit around in my pants”

“Your pants are soaked so they’ll have to come off too. Now don’t be pig headed, Peter, you’ll get a cold. You’ve got no appointments and I’ve locked the door”

“What about Carol?” I said playing my last card

“She’s not coming in until after lunch. You’ll be sitting smartly in your freshly pressed suit by then” she countered pushing me into my office and closing the door.
I hesitated, but she was right I was soaked and I was already beginning to feel cold. I turned my little fan heater on, but my suit was so wet it was useless. I looked down; it was covered in mud. I sighed and began to undress.

“Come on Pete, hurry up” shouted Kathy banging on the door. I opened the door a small crack and handed her my jacket, trousers and shirt one at a time. I stood there shivering in my wet underpants and socks. Her hand came thought the door.
“Pants” She said imperiously.
“You can’t take them to the dry cleaners” I protested.

”No but I can hang them to dry in the kitchen” she told me.

With great reluctance I peeled down my wet pants.

“I’d just like to point out” I told her defensively as I passed them through the door, “that the brown satins are due to the muddy water from the puddle”

“I’ll be back in a moment” she said and I heard the door slam and lock.

I looked around my office. It was the same as it always was. Papers strewn on the desk, the comfy armchairs for the punters, leather swivel for me, functional computer to one side of the imitation teak desk, phone to the other. A picture of me and Emma, smiling on sunlit path high in the Austrian Alps held my gaze, my eyes followed the mountains to infinity and beyond where my penis hung, a ghostly reflection spoiling the snow covered sunlit slopes. I sprang back in shock into my chair only to jump back up again at the feel of cold leather on my bare behind.

I stared at the door. No that way led to madness, but I couldn’t resist, I had to do it. And so as if drawn by some command I opened the door and walked out into the outer office. Here I was, stark naked, exposed in such a public place. How about if I tried Kathy’s office. No that was a dare too far. But once the thought was in my heads I knew I had to go for it. I stepped forward but was stopped by the rattle of a key in the lock. My heart pounded as I scurried back to the shelter of my own office. I looked around; My tie was bout the only serviceable item of clothing left, but that hid nothing. What if it was Carol, what would I say to her, how could I explain.

“Hi Pete, it’s only me” said Kathy from the outer office. “She said about an hour”

An hour, it sounded like a year to me.

“Right ho” I replied weakly sitting on my chair. I looked up startled as the door opened. Kathy’s head appeared, she grinned. “Good practice for the naturist wedding”

I gulped but could find nothing to say. “What say you we make a start on the presentation” she suggested

“Er well, I’d rather not in my present state” I replied feebly.

“Oh come on Pete, you’ll have to get used to it sometime” she told me breezily. “tell you what, you get the computer booted up while I just get out of these clothes”
I looked up in panic, but before I could say anything she was gone. I was still staring at the door two minutes later when she walked back in. She wasn’t beautiful by any means and her body was far from perfect, but the package just screamed sex on two legs at me. As she strode purposely towards me I took it all in the small firm breasts framed in the marks from her recently abandoned underwear. The smooth pale skin, the patch of dark pubic hair that thinned from the centre outwards, the firm thighs. She peeked over the edge of the desk.

“Why Peter, I do believe you are pleased to see me” she commented as she placed her firm buttocks on its polished edge. “I don’t think that thing should be exposed for too long.” Her voice was low and husky now “In fact I’ve got a place you can put it” she said sultrily as she opened her legs.

The hormones took over as leapt to my feet. Just to the left of Kathy’s exposed hip I caught sight of Emma’s photograph. She seemed to be looking at me accusingly. I reached forward and placed it face down, Emma shouldn’t watch this. Before I could move further Kathy suddenly said, “No stop, this is wrong” I halted in mid stride, she was of course right, it could only end in tears, along road of illicit sex and subterfuge, which could only end in discovery and a rather nasty divorce. I heaved a sigh of relief. I had escaped by the skin of my teeth

“I can’t do this face to face” Kathy continued firmly. With that she turned around, swept the papers from the desk before replacing them with her bare chest, leaving me with a perfect view of her perfect behind. The hormones kicked in once more, I came to attention and moved forward.

“And Peter” said Kathy “just make sure you get the right hole”

I screeched to halt again. What was that supposed to mean, was she worried bout getting pregnant? That didn’t fit with a fast uncontrolled cresta run a of a shag in the office. I contemplated the orifices before me. The pink high road to the Greek underworld or the moist hairy low most travelled road . Which should I take? Which did she want me to take? A sudden thought came into my mind, what if she had eaten a curry last night. Kath wiggled her hips impatiently, I made my decision and all caution thrown to the wind, the future mortgaged to the present I moved in for the thrill.

“Hello” The word echoed through the outer office like a gunshot down the Khyber pass. Kathy shot up and I fell down rapidly.

“I thought you said she wouldn’t be in” I hissed.

“That’s what she told me” Kathy hissed back “stall her before she comes in”

“Hello Carol, is that you?”

“Yes”

“I thought you wouldn’t be in till later” I shouted

“Swimming practice was cancelled” she replied “Is Kathy in?”

“Yes we’re having a meeting”

“I’m putting the kettle on, do you want some tea?”

“That would be nice”

“How about you, Kathy?”

I turned around, Kathy had disappeared. “She’d love one” I shouted back.

I heard the sound of Carol’s footsteps heading off towards the small kitchen area. I thought briefly of my underpants

Kathy’s head popped up from behind my desk.

“What did you tell her that for you moron” she demanded unsympathetically

“It will buy us some time” I told her

“You’ve got a plan.” An accusation not an inquiry.

“Where are your clothes?”

“In my off………Oh no, if you think I can streak across without Carol seeing me”

“There is a chance” I claimed, knowing that it lay between slim and none.

Kathy wasn’t stupid “no there isn’t; and if you think it’s possible, you go”

“Don’t be stupid I can hardly make it there and back without her seeing me” I retorted. “And I’d rather she saw me naked than wearing your clothes”

“That’s it” said Kathy standing up rapidly and inducing some alluring vibrations in her small breasts. “We’ll tell her the truth”

“What” I was astonished “tell her we were about to bonk each other’s brains out!”

Kathy blushed at the thought of what we could well have been doing at this moment. She brushed past me, I felt her smooth skin, the heat of her body, and bathed in the confidence of somebody who did have a plan. I knew I wasn’t going to like it, and I knew what it was.

“Carol are you there?” she called.

I could hear the clatter of cups in the kitchen. “Just coming she called” Had she not turned up unannounced, I could have been saying the same.

“There’s just one thing” called Kathy, and it was one big thing, well it had been a moment ago.

“We were preparing for the Hunter presentation, and we decided to do it in costume” she paused, “Or not, if you see what you mean”

There was silence in the outer office.

“I see” Carol said carefully, “I have been thinking about that”

“Just tell her to go out” I hissed at Kathy’s well rounded behind. She flapped her hand to shut me up.

“I imagine you are finding it difficult to get staff” Carol continued

‘You’d be surprised’ I thought

“If you need some help I’m up for it” Now I was surprised, but not as surprised as I was going to be.

“Well,” replied Kathy slowly “Are you sure”

“Give me a moment” came the reply

“What did you say that for” I whispered angrily.

“Well what did you expect me to say” she replied testily

“No, and go out shopping for an hour” I replied

“Look, Pete, it was a moment of madness, and something we would come to regret so its better this way.”

I couldn’t have agreed more and I had more pressing matters on my mind than resuming the spiralling downward thread of adultery. Top my current agenda was a reunion with my clothes

“Yes, yes, but if we get rid of her we can get dressed”

But it was too late as the door was already opening to reveal a stark naked Carol. She smiled as she squeezed between us carrying a tray laden with three mugs and a small plate of biscuits. She was a competitive swimmer and had broad shoulders and a wide back, her long muscled thighs led to strong well formed buttocks. I watched as she lay the tray down before sitting on a vacant chair.

“So how far have you got” said

I looked at her, sitting with her shoulders well back emphasising her small breasts with tiny pointed nipples the colour of small rosebuds just about to open. She crossed her long legs and covered her hairless vagina with her hands. Clearly Carol’s plan was the diametrically opposite of the young couple whose wedding we were planning. Take an abnormal situation and act as if you and everyone else were still dressed.